Why, oh why do I resist change? Especially when I know the change is good for me. I'm not talking about the little changes that I talk about on Tuesdays, I'm talking about big time changes. All week I have been resisting starting a new book that I know will be good for me.
"A Course in Weight Loss, 21 Spiritual Lessons for Surrendering Your Weight Forever", is sitting on my desk, waiting for me to get off my butt and start the journey. I was all pumped! I even bought a special journal and a lovely new pen for this. I made it through the introduction and the first lesson and then I froze. Something inside me started to scream, "No, no, no, no ,no, no, I don't want to deal with this, no!"
Not only that, but I started to binge eat this week to try to keep everything inside. WTH? I thought I had come to a place where I was finally ready to let go and get rid of this weight. By dealing with my food addiction and compulsive overeating I know that I can only go so far with my physical efforts. If my emotional self isn't on board, my weight loss will never happen.
So I am putting my foot down and getting professional help. Yup, I am going to counselling. I have been tossing the idea around for years and now I am ready to get serious. In my opinion, if I didn't need help I would have lost the weight by now. For me, all the self help books in the world are not going to do a bit of difference because there is something inside me that refuses to let go.
This is the year I am losing the weight for good. I have had enough! I just have to keep this mantra going, "Change is good, change is good, change is good!"
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