Weighty Thoughts for a Thursday

February 17th will mark 2 months of my journey. I am tempted to weigh myself. I am also fearful of weighing myself. What does weight represent? Do the numbers on the scale accurately tell the story of the past eight weeks? Probably not. I am worried that my weight on the 17th will not match how I am feeling. In this instance I feel that ignorance is indeed bliss.

One of the main reasons I worry is every time I see a weight loss, I binge eat to feel safe again. Why? Being thinner in my mind means more attention from the opposite sex which freaks the hell out of me. I know, I used to be in front of many people performing on a regular basis. But that was my job, not the private me. Now, it's just me. The knitting, running, mom and wife me. Sigh! Looks like I need to find a fix for this because I am tired of yo-yoing back and forth with my weight loss.

Another reason I am hesitant to weigh myself is that I know my weight has nothing to do with how fit I am.

Here I am at 169 pounds thanks to Weight Watchers. I was also so flabby that I hated showing any skin. I was counting points but did no exercise whatsoever!

 Here I am on our wedding day at 185 pounds but man I was firm! I was getting my but kicked by a personal trainer,but I paid no attention to how I was eating.

Here I am at 179 pounds and three months pregnant.

No more sugar, wheat, or pre-packages foods and I was interval training.

This was the best I have ever felt.

The solution? I will wait until April 17th to weigh myself. However, I have a goal dress that I would love to wear on my birthday in December. I will take a photo of myself on the 17th of this month and post it the following Monday.

Eeep!

Food